Two weeks ago I emailed my mentor sharing that my daughter had been home sick all week so things were ‘slow over here’…. slow and steady wins, the race, yes?!
She emailed me back. Slow is the only speed.
Ugh. Is it? I wondered.
My soul can appreciate that, my body and the fleeting speeds with which I vacuum around the house, well, not as much.
Two weeks later I took slow to the next level. I had my own encounter with the flu and now on day nine on the couch, things have really shifted.
I spent the first few days moving my schedule a few days out. Of course I’ll be better by Monday! I plowed through the entire Morning Show Series on Netflix in those three days. And then, something else happened. I wasn’t better. More couch time? Really? Still?
As my symptoms worsened, I decided that I would choose something else over Netflix. I opted for a healing meditation. For the entire day Monday I eased in and out of sleep, the meditation repeating countless times and I felt myself getting even slower. A walk didn’t feel good. Or even sound good.
Food wasn’t calling me. Nor the tv. Just being still, curled up in a ball, eyes closed. It felt so enough!
At first I was battling inside… what work could I get done while sick?
Yet, when you feel bad enough, we all let that go, as I did pretty quickly.
After three more days on the couch, I started realizing all that was coming available to me in this stillness. (Much more than had when I was tuned into Netflix).
In the quiet recesses of my mind – with no activity, or routine, no tv, no cleaning, no commitments, no making plans, or emails… No alarm setting! It was like I felt so spacious inside, and so many things I’ve wondered about over the past few months were suddenly seeming clear. Like I could make sense of it all. I wasn’t thinking about them, they were just sort of coming to me.
I began to deepen my appreciation for my body taking this time to heal and give me the stillness I must have been craving for quite some time. The deep sleep, and no 5am alarm is nurturing me from a deep place. I didn’t realize how much I needed rest. I love how the body is always on our side. Always seeking to heal.
I share this with you as a reminder to surrender. As a reminder to what is available in the stillness – in the quiet recesses of your mind. In nature while just looking at a tree. In a quiet drive without your phone or radio blaring. In a daydream. In a day without all your routines.
I realize those first few days in front of Netflix were a completely different experience from the previous three. The calm. The clarity. The gratitude. The presence. The healing. So much deeper. So much awareness. I now can see that this time has been a gift. If it had passed in a few days however, I would likely have missed the gift, the real healing.
So, I encourage you to surrender to your body. Hopefully you’re not laid up, but that when you hear the calling of your body, you can listen. You can skip the gym, order in, leave the floor un-vacuumed, and just head to bed early one evening. Space out. Put on a meditation. Or just listen to the rhythm of your breath. Let clarity come to you in the quiet.
As Ryan Holiday reminds us in Stillness is the Key,
“Sometimes you have to disconnect in order to better connect with yourself and the people you serve and love.”
Some days, I think it’s a daunting time here on planet earth! But anytime I get still, it feels so much more manageable.
To getting still, to ensure you move the right thing in the right direction!